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Starting to get real


So the wedding and this upcoming deployment are really real; I cannot deny it any longer. I have been trying so hard to push them both so far to the back of my mind that I have been living in a fog for a while now. The deployment looming so close to the wedding has made me not want to do much or get real excited for Katelyn’s wedding. I feel so bad about that because I really am so happy for Katelyn and Brett, but man it is so hard to look forward to that week.

Last week we went to a pre-deployment briefing and Shane was told I needed to go to it; so I went with him. Come to find out that was not the one I was supposed to go to and oh my gosh it was such a waste of my time. Don’t get me wrong I am all for going to any and all pre-deployment briefings but as informative as it was, it was way to long (about 15 min deployment brief and the rest newcomer info) and for newer Army spouses. The briefing for “Seasoned Spouses” was for a later date, which was the one I was supposed to go through. Well, for some reason I blew up about this two nights later. lol It hit me, that was a pre-deployment briefing I was not ready for; I had another week before I had to go and that briefing made it real sooner than I had planned. Oh my gosh, I felt silly after I blew up about it; poor Shane was like I am sorry. I was not mad at him though, just the reality of it all. I did not want to start crying yet and feeling sad; that was for next week. Ah the emotions and expectations we have when we have done this a couple of times, it does not get easier.

So Shane has started his pre-deployment Honey To Do List and getting his gear ready. I am pretending we are just cleaning and organizing to get the house ready for family and friends that are coming down for the wedding. The kids are getting moody as well, especially Lauren; she is so super sensitive right now. Shane is doing really good spending extra time with her though and giving lots of extra hugs and kisses.

The wedding, ah another stressor going on I am so thankful for my friends who are helping me out with the save the dates and programs etc.., photography, sanity, friendship and support, Gina, helping me find a DJ and so many others with decorating and ideas. I do not know what I would do without them. A military life often takes us far from our families, it is so awesome when your Army family is there for times, when others cannot.

So, now we have started on flowers, Katelyn went for her final gown fitting today at Something Blue Bridal and my Artists gown is in and it is so pretty. I got Katelyn to try on a veil with her gown today(of course she does not want one though) and yes I started to cry she was so beautiful. I cannot wait to see my Artists gown on her, she is going to look so grown up! I talked to the florist today, Kate has the cake going, We have picked out my Drama Queens dress and my little man’s suit. Kate and I figured out table center pieces, bridal and bridesmaids bouquets etc…and some paper ideas figured out. It all seems to slowly be coming together. My friends have offered to help us come up with decorating ideas and the making of some of the decorations. We have a busy week meeting with people to get things finished up.

So the reality is sinking in and I had better get to bed so I can keep up with my homework, church and cleaning tomorrow so I can get my crud together this week. Thanks for reading my vent.



  1. I love you girl! Remember if you ever need help with things I’m right here! 🙂
    We need to talk sometime this week, for sure, about the programs and menus and what needs to be on them.

  2. cari says:

    Thank you so much Brittany!! You have been so great in helping out! Do you want us to bring some pictures Saturday on what she is looking at?

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A reflection of my life shown in months: click on month to see past posts.

January 2011
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