(I am sorry this post is not the one I meant to post…I will write an explanation today)I do not remember much of the next few days; August 16-20th during 1999. I get bits and pieces that are more like fast forwarded quick thoughts someone will ask me about and they will come forward. Sometimes they are a flash of a moment that crept out from the back of my mind; to which in either case I promptly and gently put them back on the neat and tidy shelves I have tried to lock the door on the past 13 years. Sadly starting on the 16th of April every year so many memories try to flood through that door in my mind I am often overwhelmed with an intense heart ache and yearning for what coulda, shoulda, or woulda been.
This night April 16th 1999, 13 years ago today and just about to the hour after I had gotten Jay to sleep, Katelyn and I ( My Artist was staying at grandma and grandpa’s for a few days) gathered up our stuff, gave Jay kisses night night and started our walk to the Ronald McDonald house and Shane took over at the hospital with Jay; little did I know how the next day, April 17th, 1999 would totally change every facet of our lives forever.